Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Randomize