Dual....:-)
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
