its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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