I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
The best revenge is premature balding
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
