The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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