I don't think brook has ever known best
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
