Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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