Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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