My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
if you like me you must not know who I am
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i barfeds in our rink
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
