my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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