Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
