Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
