it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
