i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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