what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
