There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Randomize