This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I just sucked dick on a ferry
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
