I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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