i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
