I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
