Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
