I need help removing her.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
