You really coming over, don't trick.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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