well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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