I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
My vagina is very pro this idea
Congratulations! We have a period
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
