i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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