Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
