White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
