Texts From Last Night

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  (813): View more from Florida

  So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly

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  (813): So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly http://tfl.nu/tnq1
  Replies (15) Good night (4152) Bad night (649)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.

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  (850): I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math. http://tfl.nu/a930
  Replies (68) Good night (5160) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.

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  (757): It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean. http://tfl.nu/z8cg
  Replies (22) Good night (754) Bad night (4663)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".

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  (630): You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking". http://tfl.nu/tuao
  Replies (9) Good night (5884) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers

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  (781): he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness... (413): how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers http://tfl.nu/137y
  Replies (10) Good night (5665) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.

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  (501): Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread. http://tfl.nu/0vqb
  Replies (7) Good night (3576) Bad night (1046)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.

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  (217): I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart. http://tfl.nu/psm5
  Replies (6) Good night (2163) Bad night (963)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.

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  (414): oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv. http://tfl.nu/ywog
  Replies (7) Good night (4154) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single

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  (970): Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single http://tfl.nu/1weq
  Replies (12) Good night (2584) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.

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  (715): Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once. http://tfl.nu/y3bm
  Replies (11) Good night (3660) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.

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  (217): Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not. http://tfl.nu/3f1l
  Replies (4) Good night (1896) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON

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  (314): Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON http://tfl.nu/vk77
  Replies (6) Good night (1232) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.

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  (720): Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong. http://tfl.nu/slbv
  Replies (12) Good night (1096) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.

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  (510): Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine. http://tfl.nu/0e0b
  Replies (4) Good night (285) Bad night (161)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  i think my cat just said my name.

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  (386): i think my cat just said my name. http://tfl.nu/zcy1
  Replies (3) Good night (628) Bad night (175)

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