One girl and one boy is just not enough.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I lost the right to judge tonight