FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
