Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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