Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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