I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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