the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
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