Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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