Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
