so explain again why im purple
no
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
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If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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