Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
