And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
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Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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