are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
