i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
