Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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