There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
