My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
why do cheetos always look like penises
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize