fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
