If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?