It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
