On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
