why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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