69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
